Promises
by clouddancerg1
Summary: Part of my BOTP AU. As boys, Jason and Mark make promises to each other after a training accident.


They had completed two weeks of intense testing and had arrived back late last night, exhausted from 48 hours of survival training. Now, 17 year old, Jason was storming across the tarmac, about to take on Chief Anderson and Colonel Cronus. How could the Colonel send Mark on a training flight now? Why would the Chief let Mark go up there with less than 6 hours of sleep? He had promised them they would have today to themselves, to rest.

He was 20 feet from the two men when he froze. Jason didn't know what made him stop and look to the sky. Maybe it was a sound, a flash of light, or a feeling. All he remembered seeing was the smoke in the sky and two forms falling at acute angles from the center. Even at this distance he knew which plane was Mark's.

Jason stood as his eyes tracked the wreckage, leaving a black trail behind, until it dropped behind a stand of trees. He was watching his best friend, his brother, his closest confidant go down in a fiery blaze. Jason heard someone scream, "MAAAARK!" And didn't realize it was himself until he felt the ache in his throat. Then a fireball arose above the trees and it felt like his insides had dropped out of him.

As the orange and black mushroom cloud rose into the sky Jason could feel a cold, emptiness creeping, from his stomach, to his heart, and into his mind and soul. As the feeling rose he lost his ability to move, to feel, to think.

Then time returned to normal and as everyone around him began moving towards one of the crash sites Jason stood frozen …… empty inside.

8888

Before he was completely awake Mark knew he was in the Medical Lab of the Phoenix Foundation. Mark's brain had analyzed the smells, sounds, and movements and had told him where he was. At just over 15 years, training for 6 of them, Mark had been in this Lab many times before, either suffering from various injuries or because one of his brothers or sisters were hurt and he was sitting with them.

When Mark woke he found his right arm, chest and hip were wrapped in bandages. The doctor told him he had arrived several hours ago with severe burns, but the 'special' medicines and salves Mark had been given, when he was unconscious and then sleeping were helping his body to heal quickly. The medicine was even taking care of the pain. In a few days Mark would be completely healed and, as usual, there would be no scars.

After the doctor released Mark, Chief Anderson brought him to the mansion to rest and to finish recovering. Mark spent the rest of the afternoon by the pool with his brothers and sister. Dinner was brought out for everyone, and they ate it at the poolside bar. Then they sat and talked as the sun went down behind the trees. Princess announced that she was going inside to change into some warmer clothes. Shortly after, Tiny and Keyop decided it was time to watch a movie.

As they left, Tiny turned to look at Jason, "You coming to watch the movie too?" but he received no response.

Mark had noticed Jason had been quiet and had kept to himself since he had returned home and he had felt Jason's eyes on his back all afternoon and a few times Mark had noticed Jason's eyes slide away when he had glanced at him. Mark knew he needed to talk to Jason. Maybe Jason had the answers he was looking for.

Mark looked at Tiny and said, "We'll be in soon."

After they left Mark dropped onto the cushions at the opposite end of the wicker settee Jason was sitting on, pulled his legs up to his chest and wrapped his arms around them. Looking towards the sky he watched Frank, the first of their trio of bats who lived in the area, as he fluttered about over the pool and deck, catching mosquitoes. After waiting a minute or two Mark got up the courage to ask, "Are you mad at me, Jason?"

"What?" Jason's eyes when Mark looked at him were dark and cold, and for the first time he noticed how tense Jason's body was.

Mark started hesitantly "Well, you have not spoken to me all afternoon. The Chief has spoken barely two words to me, since I got in the car with him, to come here. And the Colonel hasn't even made an appearance. I wondered if you were all mad at me. If …."

"WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU THINK YOU WERE DOING?" Jason cut Mark off. His eyes were no longer cold they were now blazing with fury. "Why would you go up there? Haven't you been listening to anything you have been told about reaction times and exhaustion? You must have known your reaction time would be down after everything we have been put through the last few weeks."

At Jason's first blast Mark felt himself rock back on his tailbone as though he had been punched. Mark had not expected this anger, and his "Huh?" in reaction, was not even heard over Jason's rant as he continued.

"Why, the hell, would you let them talk you into going up there? You want to be a great pilot and you don't even know to watch your own reactions, observe how tired you are. You've been flying solo for less than three months. You're not going to last very long if you allow them to bully you into things you know you can't do, or that you shouldn't do."

As Jason wound down Mark looked down to make sure all his body parts were still attached and nothing was sticking out of him. When he looked back at Jason, Mark's tired mind was still focused on the first question Jason had asked and so he explained quietly, "When we got back from survival training, I returned to my room just like you guys, but I couldn't relax, couldn't get to sleep. My mind kept running over the last few days of training. I kept thinking about what we had been through and how I could improve, like we had been instructed to. I wanted to relax but I couldn't. I kept tossing and turning in bed. Finally, it was getting light so I thought I would take a Piper up for a while. When I am in the air I find, I can calm down, my mind becomes quiet." Mark ended with a shrug.

Mark rested his forehead on his knees, and closed his eyes as he tried to explain how he felt when he was flying. "When I'm up there my mind seems to clear." How could he put into words the joy, freedom, excitement, adventure he felt, without making it sound cliché? "I feel lighter, I can breathe more easily, I feel..."

"Pffffffft." When Mark heard the noise of disgust coming from Jason, he turned to him and responded defensively, "Okay! You, tell me why YOU love racing around an oval track, in a stock car, at mach one."

Mark then watched as Jason opened his mouth, and close it again, finally saying with a shake of the head and a smile, "Touché."

That was when something else Jason had yelled clicked in Mark's head. "Wait a minute, you thought the Chief or Colonel had ordered me up there?"

"Yeah. When I saw them standing talking on the tarmac, and you up there being harassed by that Impulse Jet, I just assumed the Colonel had ordered you up for some more special training."

"Did you think about talking to the Chief about this?"

"No."

"And he hasn't talked to you about … me?"

"NO! Mark."

"Well, he didn't order me up. Neither of them did. Like I said, I went up to clear my mind. I didn't expect anything to happen. I don't remember exactly what happened." Mark ended in an almost silent whisper.

Mark closed his eyes, hoping to bring back the memory of what had happened. He had been trying all afternoon to recall the collision but it was still eluding me.

Hoping that talking about it might help, Mark began, "I remember lifting off and getting clearance for my airspace. I was circling; my mind clear and I was just going with the motions, finally relaxing. I remember finishing a slow left bank when I saw this Impulse Jet coming at me. I remember checking my location and airspeed, in case I had made a mistake and moved into restricted airspace. I know I checked my location, I KNOW I was okay. I can see that on the dials. Then..."

Mark held his breath, eyes squeezed tight, and he then shook his head, but still nothing came. Mark was still drawing a blank on what happened next.

"Why won't it come?" He whispered anxiously. "I don't understand why this is happening. Why can't I remember? Why does everything I do go wrong? Why can't I do anything right?" Mark stopped as he noticed his voice had been getting louder and shakier. He tried taking a breath but it sounded like a sob instead.

Mark felt Jason shift beside him. He could feel Jason's eyes on him but Mark couldn't bring himself to look at him. He didn't want to see the pity in Jason's eyes. "Mark I know you haven't been happy for a couple of weeks but this is not right. Whatever happened you can't blame yourself. You need to talk about it. Please, talk to me if you wont talk to anyone else."

Jason waited and then Mark heard him take a deep breath before he ordered, "Come on, out with it. What's wrong?"

Mark kept his eyes shut tight and shook his head slightly. Mark knew if he looked at Jason it would all come spilling out – how much of a failure he was, and Mark didn't want to see the look of agreement in Jason's eyes. Inside Mark was yelling, 'I can't do this, don't do this. Don't make me say this.' That was when another sob broke free and Mark felt Jason move to his side.

"Talk to me, Mark." He said quietly, "How can I help?"

"No! You are meant to be indifferent, stubborn, tough." Mark thought at Jason. "Not like this … not caring. I don't want this comforting. I don't need this. I can't take this, it's too much."

Then the strain from the secret he had been holding for the last several weeks became too much, and it came bursting out, "They are going throw me off the Project Jase. I'm a failure. I'm no good at this."

Mark could hear the shock in Jason's voice when he responded, "Where did you get that idea?"

Once the first words were said the rest of what Mark had to say rushed out. "All I have heard for the last four weeks, from everyone, is I am not good enough. I 'don't have Tiny's strength' or 'Princess's skill' at structural demolition. I don't have your speed and have not 'displayed enough skill in weaponry' like you or Tiny. 'Even Keyop is showing more skill in weaponry' than I am. During individual Survival Training, this week, all I heard was 'you're doing it wrong.' or 'that's not right.'" Mark was repeating phrases he had been hearing from his different Masters and Trainers over the last month.

Mark took a deep breath, as they had been taught, in an attempt to gain some self control, before continuing, "Then, when I go and try to relax and do some flying, something I THOUGHT I was good at, I loose it and crash one of the Foundations' planes. Now the Colonel and Chief have even MORE reason to figure they're wasting their time on me and throw me off the project."

"That is not true. I mean, maybe that's what everyone has been saying, 'that you are not good enough', but you must know they are wrong."

Mark shook his head, "No they're not. Look at what happened this morning. You were right, how can I be a good pilot if I don't pay attention to how exhausted I am. I should not have been up there when I was so tired. I should have found another way to relax."

"Mark, that was an acci … When I said… You ARE good at flying. You do know what you are doing up there, I have watched you, both in the air and in the simulator. And you do have other skills and strengths that the rest of us don't have. "

"Not according to them." Mark said despairingly, jerking his chin in the direction of the Foundation.

"Look at me." Jason ordered in a sharp voice.

When Mark didn't look up he growled angrily, "Look at me."

Mark then turned his head and looked over his shoulder at him.

"Mark, you must know you have more skill than the rest of us in the dome. You move smoothly around those highest rungs and levels as if you were flying. In our stealth exercises you move like a ghost, I have not heard a bell ring or a horn blow in months when you practice, and in gymnastics you are more supple, flexible and centered than I am. What you have heard them saying, you need to get that out of your head."

Mark replied sarcastically, "Oh, great! So you get to Command the team and use your marksmanship skills, Princess can demolish all objects in our way, Tiny will overpower our enemies with his strength and Keyop can sneak into bases and crack the codes. And what do I do? I will follow you all in and dance the enemies to death, they will die laughing, because, according to you, I am supple and flexible."

Jason ignored Mark's outburst, his eyes narrowed and he continued on as if Mark had not interrupted him, "And if I hear anyone saying you're no good, then they will get a chance to see my weaponry skills up close. As your leader only I'M allowed to tell you you're no good." Mark looked at Jason for a long time, reviewing what he said, and he felt the corners of his mouth twitch as Jason's last statement slowly sank in.

Jason's voice became a hushed murmur, "You're exhausted Mark. You won't get those memories you lost back while you're pushing so hard, and maybe you're being pushed too hard. Right now you need to rest and finish healing. After you have given it more time, THEN, maybe you will remember what happened this morning. For now, continue to focus on your breathing; focus and let the tension out."

Mark let his head drop onto his knees. "You know you sound like Master Sianyanari, right?" He mumbled. Then Mark followed Jason's orders and taking a few breaths felt the tense muscles in his back, neck and shoulders ease.

"Well he has been working with us…. me for 10 years now. I know his little phrases by heart. Mark don't let everything you have been hearing get to you. You do have skills and you are needed on this team. Let me deal with any fallout from the Chief and Cronus for now. Do you have a headache?" Jason finished with a note of concern in his voice.

Mark had not realized his hands had moved up and were massaging his temples until Jason spoke. "Mmmmm." Was all he could manage, he was starting to feel tired again.

"It wouldn't surprise me. It's either from the tension you've been under or, more likely, the concussion you got this morning." Jason informed him and then as Jason continued to sit quietly Mark let his mind wander, until it settled on something he had heard this morning; something that still bothered him now.

"Jason." Mark muttered and then not sure if Jason had heard him Mark raised his head and turned it towards him. "Jase? Today in the Med Lab, before I was released, I had a few visitors from the Airfield. One of them said you …… that you froze out there." He wasn't saying this right and the person who had spoken had to be wrong. They had been told, trained, to keep moving no matter what.

Mark watched as Jason glanced out of the corner of his eye and then twitched a shoulder, "Don't know what you mean."

With their bodies so close Mark could feel Jason become tense. It looked like it was going to be his turn to probe for information from Jason. Mark turned his body in the small space he had, tilted his chin down and looked at him through his eyelashes. Jason glanced at Mark and shifted away saying, "That's not going to work."

Mark tried another tack; he raised his chin, tilted his head slightly and opened his eyes wide. "That blue-eyed innocent look won't help either." Jason responded, shaking his head slightly.

Mark smirked and turned his head, hoping he hid the smile. Oh, but it WAS working he could feel Jason relaxing again. Mark knew something had happened; Jason's response and rigidity told him so. Now he just needed to find out what it was.

"What happened this morning Jase?" Mark tried again and got another shrug.

By now, Jason had moved as far over to his end of the settee as was possible and was looking out across the pool, so Mark waited. Since they had become friends, Mark had learned that sometimes when Jason was left alone, if he wasn't pushed, he would start talking. He hoped this would be one of those times.

Finally Jason closed his eyes and shook his head before responding, "Mark, I thought you were… When I saw your plane going down…. There was no sign of you and …… Yah! I froze. Okay?" Jason ended with a growl and leaned into the back of the settee, his hands in his pockets.

"Ummm, Why?" Mark shook his head, not really the best response he could come up with. What better way to get another verbal blast, or more likely a bruise or two, than to question his older brother? But Mark didn't get the blast he was expecting. Jason just sat there looking out across the pool.

When Jason finally spoke he asked, "You remember the promise we made a few years back?"

Mark shrugged and shook his head. 'Was this leading somewhere?' He wondered. "What prom ...?" Mark had just started to ask, when Jason reached out, grabbed his left hand and with his thumb traced an invisible scar on the heel of Mark's thumb. Then Mark remembered...  
_  
Jason's fourteenth birthday. They had celebrated it up top at the mansion, but Jason had said he needed to get away, so the two of them were sitting cross legged at the bottom of the cliff in the sun-warmed sand, Jason facing Mark. Jason had reached for Mark's left wrist and turned his hand face up. As Jason brought the blade of his pocketknife to Mark's palm he tried to pull away, but Jason just held on tighter. "This is part of it. If you keep struggling it will cut deeper, hurt more," he said. Jason brought the knife back to Mark's palm and pulled the blade across the heel of his thumb. Mark jerked his hand out of Jason's grip and squeezed the cut with his other hand, blood oozed along the line of the cut. When Mark looked up Jason had made a similar cut under his own thumb and he was reaching for Mark's hand again. Then they had been clasping hands, cuts pressed together, fingers linked. "We are now Blood Brothers." Jason had declared, "That means we will always be there for each other. We will always watch out for each other and we will never be alone again. I won't promise not to kick your ass if you piss me off, but I will never let anyone else touch you."_

Mark looked into Jason's eyes, and questioned in a whisper, "You mean the Blood Brothers promise?"

Jason nodded his head. "That Blood Promise means I will always protect you and never let you get hurt, by anyone, or anything."

"And what does that have to do with you freezing at the airfield this morning?"

Mark could see frustration rise in Jason's eyes and the tension returned to his body. "Dammit, Mark your plane was going down and I couldn't see a parachute. Then there was this huge fireball and all I could think was…" Jason shook his head, "I couldn't think, I WASN'T thinking, I was just – empty. I was watching your plane go down and I couldn't do anything to help you. I should have been there to protect you."

Mark wondered how he should respond to what Jason had just said? What should he say? He would deal with the easy stuff first. "I'm going to start by saying two things Jason. One, I was in a civilian plane. There were no parachutes in there. I told you I went up to relax, not to do anything fancy. Two,"

And now Mark started to smile partly to take the sting out of his next words, "I wouldn't want your help up there. You're good on the ground, in a car, but up there - leave the flying to me. You just told me, a few minutes ago, that you think I know what I'm doing up there. Then believe me when I say, if you had been with me, you would have been in the way."

Good, Mark could feel Jason relaxing. He took a deep breath, now for the hard part, "Do you think we did the right thing by making that blood promise? Maybe it is not right for us in the situation we are in. You can't be there all the time to protect me. And …. and if it is going to make you forget our training…"

"Mark," Jason jumped in. "When the war starts, no one else is going to be there to protect us. If we do not watch out for one another, and I mean all five of us, then we are not going to succeed as a team. The five of us will not be able to survive this war."

"But, Jason when you become Commander you will not be able to freeze like that. When the war begins you will 'have to act, not react'." Mark finished by quoting General Bradbury. How often had he told them that?

"What makes you think I will be Commander?"

Mark blinked, now where had that come from? He had not expecting that line of thought. "What? You think Princess will be made Commander? Or Tiny? Princess is skilled at detonations and is compassionate; but she does not have the passion to lead. Tiny has a passion but it is to fly jets. Could you see him pulling order from chaos during a battle? Tiny is a follower not a leader; even he has even admitted that, he looks to others, you, for assurance and security. And we both know Keyop does not have the bearing or maturity for command not yet, maybe in another few years. He is too young; he still thinks this is all a game. You have the confidence, passion and the drive. Some of the qualities the General said are necessary to becoming a good leader."

"What about you?"

Mark laughed at that thought. "Come on Jase. I won't make Commander. I'm two years younger than you and four years behind you in my training. How could I ever make Commander? And who would ever listen to my orders?"

Mark was taking a breath when something else occurred to him, "And did you forget, I am not going to be here. Once Colonel Cronus has his say to the Board and the Chief, about destroying that Piper, I'm going to be out of here."

"Mark I said I will deal with the Colonel and the Chief. I am not going to let them throw you out of here and you are putting yourself down again." Then Jason said in a hushed voice, "I would follow you."

"Yeah, like what you say to Cronus and the Chief will have any affect on how this Programme is run." And then as Jason's final words sank in Mark felt his eyes pop open and he sat there staring at Jason. He could not believe what Jason had just said. Why would Jason be willing to follow him? Someone who was younger than Jason was, someone whom Jason continuously reminded was a pain in the ass. What did Jason see that made him think Mark was good enough to lead him, let alone lead the team?

"You trust me that much? You believe I am capable of that much?" Mark said with wonder.

"Mark you may have started training a few years later than me but, you are quickly catching up. In another few years…. you may actually give me a good fight; I won't have to keep pulling my punches. Then you would make a good Second in Command."

"I thought you just said I would make a good Commander." Mark protested looking at Jason.

Jason's eyes, when Mark looked at them, held a challenge in them, "Now why would I say that? What I SAID was that I would be willing to follow you. As Second in Command there may be times when I am incapacitated or injured and then I would have to follow your lead. It also means you would be strong enough to protect yourself and you would not need my protection. But, I think the other three will still need protecting. I worry about what would happen if they were to end up fighting by themselves, or if they got captured."

That comment made some of the images General Bradbury had recently shown them about torture race through Mark's mind. Jason continued to look him in the eye as he finished. "Mark I need you to promise that you will help me keep them safe. I would feel better knowing, if we need to split up during a mission, one of us will always be there to protect the other three."

"I do not want to see them hurt either, but… do you really think that is necessary?" Mark responded and then he grimaced. Here he was questioning Jason again.

Jason shrugged and replied, "When we are out there, only we can protect each other."

Mark thought to himself, 'Could Jason be right? Tiny seemed strong enough to overcome any opponent. The rest of us had been taught strategies for using our smaller mass to our advantage. What was I missing? Had Jason been told something during his individual strategy sessions that I had not been? More than likely, since he was going to be leading us.' Then Mark heard General Bradbury's voice in his head, "Don't question, just follow orders."

After thinking everything through once more, Mark shook his head, still unsure of himself. He had to trust Jason, and what Jason had been told.

So Mark gave the response that seemed most reasonable, "Okay, I promise, I will do anything, within my power, to keep the others from harm. Satisfied?" Mark cocked an eyebrow at him and then reached out to shake Jason's hand, but pulled back saying with a chuckle, "Just tell me you will not make this a Blood Promise again."

Jason laughed, "No, a handshake will do this time."

As they clasped hands Jason made his promise, "I promise I will keep Princess, Tiny and Keyop safe. No matter what the cost to myself."

Then Jason pulled Mark off balance and against his side before he stood up. "Come on, Mouse, we had better get inside or we will end up watching Keyop's movie choice of Jurassic Park again."

Mark sat up, looked out across the pool and then up into the sky, noticing that Fred and Freda had joined Frank the bat and they had brought their friend Bethany to chase the mosquitoes. Mark knew he should question Jason about the wording of his promise, but he was too tired to start, what he knew could turn into a battle, right now. Maybe tomorrow.

Feeling better for their talk Mark stood and walked up the stairs to the upper deck. Then he turned and looked over his shoulder at Jason and said, "I believe it is my turn to choose the movie."

"No way. You chose last time," Jason grumbled. "It's my turn this time and I want The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy. I think we could use a comedy about now, and Marvin the Paranoid Android should give us a good laugh."

"Well, you've got to get there before I do bro." Mark laughed starting to run along the path. Jason gave chase running up the stairs and passing an injured Mark as they raced towards the house.


End file.
